The Sunday Snewz Issue No. 19
June 18, 2023: Dads, Division, and Checking for Dicks
We need to step away from the idea that to see justice, someone else has to lose. I heard this statement being made by a black man who appeared on the Dr. Phil show recently. Don’t stop reading my material, I promise I wasn’t actually watching Dr. Phil. The clip just happened to come across my Instagram feed. He was making a strong argument against reparations, and the idea that white people have to somehow lose in order for black people to win. What a brilliant man. If I knew who he was, I would surely give him credit here for the quote.
This idea of winners and losers in humanity has permeated nearly every sector of society. Inherently racist and regressive ideas that in order for one race to advance, another must be held back. For gay people to be seen and heard, straight people must accept their every word and action as gospel. If poor people are to move upwards into economic prosperity, rich people have to surrender their wealth - which a basic study in economics 101 would disprove - who is going to provide assistance, charity and opportunity if we strip the financially prosperous of their earnings? Money isn’t limited - that’s the beauty of it. Anyone and everyone can make more of it with the right help. And women have been sold the lie that in order for us to succeed, men must suffer. I have news for you, deprecating others doesn’t build you up. In fact, it tears everyone down as a whole.
I loathe the stupid dad commercials portraying men as bumbling idiots in the kitchen. Detergent ads depicting the frazzled dad, crying baby lying on the floor as he foolishly attempts to fold the laundry. Unsuccessful, of course, leaving a stack of shirts looking like a crumbling Tower of Pisa. The list of dad bashing commercials is endless, just Google “Stupid Dad Ads” and see for yourself. Libman Mop encourages women to think they are the only one’s capable of mopping a floor, because men will attempt to clean a kitchen floor with a power-washer. Excuse me, but isn’t this sort of sexiest against women? For the record, my husband won’t let me near the dishwasher. As one recent genius meme described, “Some people load the dishwasher like a Swedish Architect, while others load it like a raccoon on meth.” I’m the latter. My husband also insists on ironing his own shirts because I won’t do the job to his satisfaction. He also grocery shops, writes our thank you cards, sends Christmas and birthday gifts and manages our finances. All this on top of going to work everyday as a highly skilled and revered Interventional Radiologist, driving our daughter to school on days his schedule allows, helping her with her math homework, taking care of our lawn, taking out the trash, cleaning up the dinner dishes, taking his turn at walking the dog, and about a million other obligations required in life.
What if the tables were turned? How would women respond if major brands showed women in boardrooms, fumbling through papers, looking a fool in front of a mahogany table of men in dark blue suits? Or if car companies showed women incapable of handling a vehicle at 80 mph on the highway? Brands like Michelin tires running commercials of women hitting curbs with a silent caption at the end, “Got a women behind the wheel, Michelin is here for you.” I think it’s fair to say this wouldn’t go over well.
Mom’s don’t have to win by making dads lose. Women don’t advance by holding men back. We’re all in this together.
Elite status for sale
Back in February of this year, Meta, the parent company of Facebook and Instagram began selling the highly coveted blue checkmark. Stealing a move out of Elon’s playbook over at Twitter, Zuckerberg couldn’t pass up the opportunity for the additional revenue. Smart move - $660 million dollars in the first 24 hours isn’t a bad day at the office. Pissing-off celebrities who had exclusive access to the darling blue designation. Using it as yet another sign of their superiority to the rest of us was well worth the added cash garnered from la classe ouvriere. (The working class for you peasants who don’t speak French - like me.) At the time, I didn’t give the story any attention. Why would I? My time is spent influencing and adding real value in the real world rather than seeking status virtually. But recently, I noticed my Instagram story being littered with views from Blue Checks. Who are all these elites who have taken fancy to my page? Turns out they aren’t celebrities at all, just the same commoners who followed along during my not so subtle objections to the Covid response. The people who cheered me on during my fight against censorship, followed me over to alternative platforms and sent me messages claiming their equal disdain for the whittling away of free speech by these social media giants. So why is it that the self-proclaimed free speech warriors are now sporting paid blue checks? I guess the opportunity for make-believe elite status was just too good to pass up. Join the SS, no way! Unless of course I get to be a Colonel. Or maybe I’m just bitter there are more people willing to pay Zuckerberg $14.99 per month to strip away their freedom of speech than are willing to pony up $8.00 per month for a paid subscription to my Substack which serves to preserve it.
Bring back the show us your genitals rule
In 2011, the Swedish soccer team was required to show their genitalia at the Women’s World Cup. Apparently, three New Guinea squad members were accused of being men, so in order to solve the dispute the players were instructed not to shave “down there” in preparation to show their genitalia to the doctor. Nilla Fischer, one of the star players for Team Sweden told The Times, “No one wanted to jeopardize the opportunity to play at the World Cup so we just had to get the shit done, no matter how sick and humiliating it felt.”
I vote we bring back this method and settle the current transgender females in biological female sports dilemma once and for all: you have a dick, you don’t play!
This would also clear up misunderstandings such as what happened when I was competing at the 2017 Alpha Games in Nice, France. I had won the 2016 Alpha Games and returned the following year, not with hopes of winning, as I hadn’t trained at the same level, but for the experience and the fun. Thank goodness because my podium dreams, along with the dreams of the entire field, were crushed when Hannah Caldas walked onto the floor. Caldas was, in our minds, unquestionably a biological male. We were wrong. Turns out she was diagnosed in 2008 with a benign pituitary adenoma brain tumor. After her doctor recommended pool therapy to relieve pain from the myriad of health problems she was experiencing, she went on to become a 2012 Olympic hopeful for the Portuguese Swim Team.
Oops - honest mistake. And for the record, Hannah and I remain friends to this day.
A Kennedy in the White House
Oh what a dream it would be. RFK Jr. appeared on the Joe Rogan podcast this week and it is an episode I plead everyone of you to watch. Rogan begins the segment by honestly admitting his long-held belief that Bobby Junior is sort of whacky, conspiracy theorist, anti-vaxxer not to be given much attention. That is until he read his book, The Real Anthony Fauci during the pandemic.
I won’t go on with any gushing about RFK Jr. but I will tell you this -if you have any real concerns for the trajectory of tyranny our country is on, or if you’d rather lick a leper’s ass than see part two of Brandon versus Orange Man, get to know him. There has never been a more important time for Americans to stop perpetuating narratives we know nothing about and begin the respectable practice of critical thinking.
If given the opportunity, Kennedy will be the first Democrat for President I will have ever cast a vote but that hardly seems like an appropriate label. The Democratic party is no longer a shadow of what it has historically stood for and the Republican party is spinelessly stuck in the status quo.
RFK Jr. is neither.
We are the hollow men We are the stuffed men Leaning together Headpiece filled with straw. Alas! Our dried voices, when We whisper together Are quiet and meaningless As wind in dry grass Or rats' feet over broken glass In our dry cellar Shape without form, shade without colour, Paralysed force, gesture without motion; Those who have crossed With direct eyes, to death's other Kingdom Remember us-if at all-not as lost Violent souls, but only As the hollow men The stuffed men. -T.S. Elliott Part I The Hollow Men
This haunting poem by the modernist writer, T.S. Elliott in 1925 describes a desolate world, populated by empty, defeated people. Its relevance is obvious today. We need less hollow men.
$15 a month to buy a blue check mark? {laugh} {sigh} What a crazy world.