I like most people, but I respect very few.
I gauge my level of respect for others based upon their actions. More specifically, if they are doing the WORK to become better. This measuring stick means very few people earn my respect.
I have little interest in what people say they want but if they are actively working to achieve it, they have my unwavering support.
As a coach, people always knew they could come talk to me anytime they needed it. Truly, my office door was always open and some days I didn’t get much work done aside from listening to people share things they needed to share. This open door policy ended however, if they wanted to come in and bitch and moan about the same shit day after day without doing something to solve the problem. This same principle carries true in my personal and professional life today.
Hate your job? Cool; what are YOU actively doing to improve it or change it? Are you talking to your boss about your dissertation and offering solution? Are you saving money at every corner so you can go back to school or change professions?
You’re unhappy in your marriage? Understandable; what are YOU doing to improve it?
You’re fat and tired? No shame, we all fuck up and neglect ourselves from time to time. What are YOU doing every day now to change that? Are you walking everyday? Are you going to bed and waking at the same time each day? How many colors are you eating in each meal?
I have known people for the better part of 15 years who are still complaining about the same shit they were struggling with since the day we went. Heck, there’s people I’ve known since birth who are in the same boat! While I still like these peoole very much, I have no interest in hearing about their problems. I like them but I don’t respect them. Chances are, if you’re bitching about the same things after 15 years, you’re not doing the work to change it.
I also know people who are doing really hard things to improve their lives and I reach out to them often. I’m there to listen to them share their struggles because they are doing the work to change it. Change isn’t easy but it also isn’t impossible.
One of the biggest factors that led me to clean up my act with alcohol was my loss of self-respect. I liked me, but I didn’t respect myself because I wasn’t doing the work to be better. I was still funny, smart, and inspiring but I was full of shit. I was complaining about everything from my weight to the lack of growth in my business but the truth was, I wasn’t doing all I could to change it.
Whether others respect you or not isnt the issue, lack of respect for yourself is what matters most.
Are you still struggling with the same things year after year? If so, you aren’t doing the work.
If you are working to be better, I’m here for you every step of the way. If you want to talk about being better but aren’t willing to do the work, I don’t have the time. Hit me up when you’re ready to earn respect for yourself and you surely will earn mine too.
I enjoy your writing, makes a lot of sense, but I am very offended by your use of the F word. You can get your point across just as well without the use of profanity.