I took my daughter out to practice driving for the first time today; she was in tears an hour later. Tears of joy that is, because of how proud she was of herself.
In order to fully grasp this scenario, you have to know a few things about my daughter, Scarlett. She is extremely cautious, follows all the rules and often argues against doing anything that could be dangerous or end in injury. Driving checks just about every one of those boxes, so it is understandable why she was hesitant to give driving a try. She was 16 months old before she took her first step, although she was clearly able to walk. You could see it on her face that if there was the slightest chance she would fall, she was out! She wasn't going to let go of the furniture until she knew for certain she wasn't going to topple over. To her credit, this strategy is working out pretty damn good for her so far.
When I picked her up from school, we just happened to start talking about driving and decided today was the day. She agreed to practice in a remote parking lot, just to get the feel for the gas, break, and begin to understand all of the aspects of driving a vehicle. Per usual, she wants to understand every ounce of a subject before she takes it on. She hopped into the drivers seat and within minutes was comfortable with the pedals and making some easy turns in the parking lot. She completely surprised me. I had envisioned me clutching hold of the dash, as she jerked between the gas and break, death gripping the steering wheel so we didn't end up in the lake. I was completely mistaken. I could see the pride welling up in her, so I suggested we take her new skills out onto the road. She was scared, but with some encouragement, she diligently turned on her right blinker and off we went. She drove like a f%cking champ! She eased her way up to the 35 mph speed limit, relaxed into her seat and navigated us along the beautiful lake drive, all the way back into town.
When we pulled over to switch places, she buried her head into my shoulder and wept. Needless to say, I did the same. Her words to me were this, "I couldn't have done this without you. You always know just how to push me past my comfort zone without forcing it. You always encourage me to do things I'm scared to do and without you, I wouldn't be doing half the things I do." I told her while I certainly do push her, everything she does is because of her, not me. I'm simply doing my job as her mom, to show her how to be proud of herself. Not make me proud, not make her dad proud, not impress others, but to have pride in herself!
I'm hard on her. I'm hard on myself, as well as everyone around me. Most of my writings and teachings involve calling people out on their personal responsibilities, or more precisely, their lack of taking personal responsibility. All of my writings originate in the internal dialogue I have with myself, not what I'm preaching to others. I'm writing and speaking out loud, all of what I am saying to myself because I want to be the best person I can be and I want that for everyone else, as well.
I'm tough for one reason only....I believe people are truly amazing! Not just a select few; everyone. If I thought people were pathetic, I wouldn't call them out when they're acting pathetic. I would sit back and watch people be less than than their best, if I didn't believe they could be great.
None of us rise to our highest potential by being told we're just enough the way we are. We don't become great humans from encouragement alone. We become the best we are capable of by being pushed, by being challenged and being encouraged to go one step further.
Greatness happens when challenge and support intersect.
Daily Truth Feb. 22, 2022