If we don’t agree with everything a person says or believes, we write them off as someone we can’t learn anything from. This isn’t a good path for us to be traveling down.
I’ve lost plenty of “friends” during this pandemic. It is bothersome for about 2 minutes, because like all humans, I have a need to be liked just like anyone else. There’s always that sort of “sting” when we find out we’ve said or done something to anger someone but thankfully, I get over it pretty quickly.
The pandemic has also been a time when so called “haters” who have disagreed with me on any number of issues in the past have suddenly, once again become supporters, because now our views align. So be it. I’m here to speak my mind, while being sure what I’m talking about has a source beyond my own ass. People can take what they like and leave what they don’t. That’s the beauty of having an open mind and people should try it out more often.
While I’ve certainly said things that could have been said better, I will never apologize for speaking truth. Flawed as my words may sometimes be, at least I’m speaking and that’s a hell of a lot more than most anyone else is doing. I write about 2000 words per day. I read one book per week and record about 5 hours of conversations on my podcast per month.
I’d like to ask all the cancel crazy wimps how many words they write? I’d like to ask them how many books they’re reading on the topics they feel so passionately about that they write people out of their lives to defend? My guess is zero but we never get the opportunity to ask them, because when they don’t agree with people, they shut them out of their lives. Interesting if you think about it and quite revealing about their true nature.
Cowardice is the first word that comes to mind. Rather than having respectful dissent, and discussing conflicting ideas and opinions, we choose to erase people from existence. We see it in the form of cancel culture in the world at large but I guarantee you’re practicing it in your own life as well.
I have a mentor with whom I had a massive verbal disagreement with awhile back. He was furious with me about something I had said and I was equally furious with him about what he was accusing me of. We are both brave souls and neither one of us was going to back down. After a lengthy discussion and pleading our cases to one another, we not only found common ground but built a level of trust that is rare and enviable. These sort of conversations are uncomfortable as fuck, but so very necessary and worth it. Brave people have authentic friendships. By sticking around to engage in dissent, you not only learn how to formulate an argument but you also get to learn how often you are wrong. Chances are you could use some humility. I know I could.
If you plan to associate only with people with whom you agree on every topic, prepare for a very small, uninteresting circle. There isn’t a person on earth from whom you can’t learn something, it’s just that you’re often too arrogant to recognize it.